You are the first to hear it...I have found out I have a long lost son who is being raised just minutes from my house by two very loving parents (and he has a younger brother). "Nate" as he is called is a wonderfully talented child (what would you expect?) and excels at just about everything. He is a senior in high school (like Devon) and has just gotten his driver's license...and get this....He just got a job TODAY at....of all places....Off Broadway Shoes...It brings a tear to a mother's eyes...The family discount I will get makes a lump well in my throat...
Okay, so he's not my son...he could learn to be. Photographer extraordinaire and admitted-only-owns-five-pair-of-shoes-but-wants-to-be-a-shoe lover (ha!) Karen's son just got a job at the shoe mecca...I am torn between euphoria for her (FINALLY - HE GOT A JOB) and sheer agony (WHY, WENDY'S DEVON, WHY?) Think of the discounts just waiting to be taken but going by the wayside...This travesty mustn't happen...Karen, you MUST begin to love shoes or turn over custody of Nate to me for the brief moments my feet hit OBS (until I get the discount!) and then, he's your son again...okay, don't be looking for any child support now...
Does he realize what a sweet job he has? .... shoe discounts, shoes, purses (okay, that's a stretch) -- ah that is the life...At least he doesn't have to wear a uniform, smell like Bacon Cheeseburgers and Biggie fries and wear a visor like Steve Spurrier. We don't even get a free Frostie out of the deal. WHY DEVON WHY?
Good luck Nate! Your loving mom MARY (that's M-A-R-Y)
Thursday, October 18, 2007
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Shoe of the Week: Where Urban Meets the Jungle
Photo by: Karen "She's gonna learn to love shoes" Paulson
Can you believe it? Shoe of the Week is finally here!
Get the title? - The urban (the manhole and the modern design of the shoes) and the jungle (the vines and the animal print ON the shoes)...okay, maybe it's a stretch but I like the sound of it. The story behind these shoes: They are the favorite in my collection! Number one out of 113 pair! (Okay, that is beween 947 and 2,587 pair less than Imelda Marcos, thank you very much) These Antonio Melani shoes are made of real animal hair (sorry PETA) and were originally $139.99. I picked them up for a sweet bargain of $29.99 at Dillards. Why the price reduction on these shoes? Who has the guts to wear them? UH, that would be ME! Everywhere I go, I get compliments on these shoes (perhaps people do that because they are scared what I might do to them - uh, only someone with outrageous taste would wear these glorious boots). These shoes are insane(ly wonderful!) The only thing that would make them even more glorious would be if they were RED and black...Are you listening Antonio Melani? Go Dawgs! Life's short - Enjoy the shoes!
Sunday, October 14, 2007
My life - sitcom or tragedy (you decide) and other stuff (like shoes...I am getting verklempt)
So I spend most of the morning yesterday dodging right and left verbal uppercuts from a triad of ungrateful ingrates (okay, can you tell I have not slept in a while?) But I like that phrase...triad of ungrateful ingrates...NOTE TO SELF: Copyright this phrase... Then, I spend 1 1/2 blistering hours gathering up Scout stuff and camping stuff and stuff stuff for an overnight Cub Scout campout that (darn ! It was supposed to be in the upper 30s last night) I can't attend because I have to be home with our teenagers (uh, this is a sincere DARN).
Luckily, (sincere DARN) I was able to go out and do some activities with the Cub Scouts, Mark and the other parents. Fishing, cooking and lots of laughs and learning with the boys. I got a chance to reminisce about actually catching a tree with my fishing line and literally reeling a boat...maybe not so much a boat, more of a canoe with a motor...into the shore...It really was nice...So, I got home with smoke filled, but nicely straightened hair if I do say so myself. SIDE BAR: Okay, I did it on my own without Mark's help...I mean without my hairdresser's help or was it my girlfriend's help or?...okay, most of you know it already...My husband USUALLY straightens my hair...I am weaning myself from that and branching out on my own and doing pretty darn good at it too - at least so I think, well maybe...I digress.
So then, I know I have a party to go to sans Mark in the neighborhood (Thank God it was in the neighborhood, because Devon's car is kaput, Mark had the Suburban, Devon had the van and I had two feet that were made for walking)...FORGOT, that I had no mode of transportation to get something to bring to the party...So while staring at mounds of Ramen noodle packages (that is SOOO college party hors d'oeuvres, but hey, we are all still young - why not channel our youth, right?)...I found a bag of tortilla chips, salsa in the fridge (I combined several jars in a tupperware container to make it appear to be homemade - sorry Kelly!) AND boiled a pound (just one pound - egads) of shrimp with Old Bay seasoning (I did have to call Mark at the camp site to get directions on how to make this) ... NOTE TO SELF: Mark is not allowed to attend any events when there is an important party going on...He's the chef de jour -- uh, that's every day by the way -- I would have had loads of stuff to bring had he been here to actually "cook and run" ...Although, perhaps that is okay. I would've literally needed a pack mule to haul our usual party foods....
Back to me...I proceeded to get ready and walk the oh 1/4 mile or so to the party donning my black leather biker jacket with zippers (Oh, it has such ZIP - I LOVE IT!) and Michael Kors (okay, I am welling up with tears) beautiful, animal hair clogs...2nd time they have been worn....okay, didn't actually wear the clogs while walking...in a true show of class and intelligence, I carried said clogs in my right hand, while donning a Harris Teeter bag filled with my contribution to the party AND...get this, a SUH-WHEAT turquoise suede and black leather, grommet studded kidney shaped/oblong purse...
When I arrived at the door...oh wait, I have to tell you about these clogs....$290 originally (as I recall)...HUGE sale at Belk in South Park and the shoes are marked down...WAY DOWN....so, again, these are Michael Kors shoes (I am hyperventilating a bit)....Got the register and the salesclerk charges me $10.90...you heard it...$10.90 for the MK shoes...OMG...well, I thought they were more but didn't say anything (but many Hail Marys to assuage the guilt knowing I should've been charged more)...well, we got the shoes home, they should have charged me $49.99 for the shoes...STILL, I would've paid that for the shoes...they are so sassy....I've overpaid for many items in that store so I have done my penence...right? Work with me...back to story....
Okay, with bare feet, I arrived at my destination and promptly dropped the shoes, slid my feet in and rang the doorbell...The crowd was so impressed that I walked all that way in my Michael Kors shoes, with food, my sassy purse and didn't break a sweat (RIGHT, CROWD?) Okay, I was sweaty, flustered and walked in and no one was there but heard the constant drone of Corn Hole going on so I knew that at least THIS time, I didn't get the party date wrong -- I was a bit confused by either the Memorial Day, Labor Day or Love Your Neighbor Day party that goes on each year...Planned to show up the following day (oops?) Well, everyone was out on the deck when I arrived (save the Cornhole junkies!)... It was awesome (of course, I showed everyone my shoes...)
Oh, rewind a bit to earlier in the evening....while I was deciding what shoes I would wear to the party (was actually looking for some FABULOUS animal print ankle boot numbers - I think they may be my favorite pair of shoes ever)...I get a call...I note the time, it is after 8 p.m. I am thinking Kelly, "Party Host Extraordinaire" is calling to see where the heck I am...No, it's Cynthia, Miss"Other Party Host Extraordinaire/Shoe Lover/TN VOLUNTEER - Bleeds Orange"....the first words out of her mouth...."Mary, just wanted to make sure you did not need to be on suicide watch." I am thinking, "She caught my vibe...I can't find my favorite, gasp, pair of shoes EVER..." I have loads of shoes under the bed and simply did not have enough time to go through them all...Thank GOD for Michael Kors...Then, I hung up, grabbed the stash and started trodding my way uphill (both ways) to the party....it suddenly dawned on me, "OOOOOOHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOO! Mr. Bill!" Okay, not really....any of you who do not "get" THIS reference need to grab those pull-ups, the blankie and GO TO BED...AGAIN, you are toooo young to get this whole shoedawgshoe thing! Back to reality -- I really said, "OOOOOOOHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! The Dawgs are losing...to Vandy....that would be Vanderbilt....that would be depressing...." The whole night, I thought the Dawgs had met their demise (along with LSU - versus Kentucky -- ...in 3 overtimes...) But I kept my red-and-black- bleeding, SUH-WHEAT- leather- biker- jacket-wearing, Michael Kors shoes donning-head held high...
Fast forward, so I trod home merrily (really!), supporting my Bulldawg Nation to the hilt and finally lay my head down and wake up to a phone call at 4:30 a.m.....Devon wanting to spend the night at a friend's house...after figuring out the ploy at that early a time in the morning - I called him back THREE times and he finally got his rear end home....
I head to the Cub Scout campsite this morning with the bad news....And, Nolan was sooooo down....couldn't understand HOW we could lose to Vandy...I was dragging my bulldawg tail too today...UNTIL....Mimi and Pop called and long story short, informed us that the DAWGS pulled it out...no time left....kicked a field goal....it was up.....it was GOOOOOOOOOOD! 20-17 win...It was "OUTSTANDING!" as Mark put it...well, the Bulldawg Nation is very happy tonight (especially the one that resides in Fort Mill, South Carolina)....and when I found out the news...was donning some sweet Indian beaded flip-flops - Does my ignorance make me a bad fan? .... Talk amongst yourselves!
Shoes, victory...both are a great thing!
Luckily, (sincere DARN) I was able to go out and do some activities with the Cub Scouts, Mark and the other parents. Fishing, cooking and lots of laughs and learning with the boys. I got a chance to reminisce about actually catching a tree with my fishing line and literally reeling a boat...maybe not so much a boat, more of a canoe with a motor...into the shore...It really was nice...So, I got home with smoke filled, but nicely straightened hair if I do say so myself. SIDE BAR: Okay, I did it on my own without Mark's help...I mean without my hairdresser's help or was it my girlfriend's help or?...okay, most of you know it already...My husband USUALLY straightens my hair...I am weaning myself from that and branching out on my own and doing pretty darn good at it too - at least so I think, well maybe...I digress.
So then, I know I have a party to go to sans Mark in the neighborhood (Thank God it was in the neighborhood, because Devon's car is kaput, Mark had the Suburban, Devon had the van and I had two feet that were made for walking)...FORGOT, that I had no mode of transportation to get something to bring to the party...So while staring at mounds of Ramen noodle packages (that is SOOO college party hors d'oeuvres, but hey, we are all still young - why not channel our youth, right?)...I found a bag of tortilla chips, salsa in the fridge (I combined several jars in a tupperware container to make it appear to be homemade - sorry Kelly!) AND boiled a pound (just one pound - egads) of shrimp with Old Bay seasoning (I did have to call Mark at the camp site to get directions on how to make this) ... NOTE TO SELF: Mark is not allowed to attend any events when there is an important party going on...He's the chef de jour -- uh, that's every day by the way -- I would have had loads of stuff to bring had he been here to actually "cook and run" ...Although, perhaps that is okay. I would've literally needed a pack mule to haul our usual party foods....
Back to me...I proceeded to get ready and walk the oh 1/4 mile or so to the party donning my black leather biker jacket with zippers (Oh, it has such ZIP - I LOVE IT!) and Michael Kors (okay, I am welling up with tears) beautiful, animal hair clogs...2nd time they have been worn....okay, didn't actually wear the clogs while walking...in a true show of class and intelligence, I carried said clogs in my right hand, while donning a Harris Teeter bag filled with my contribution to the party AND...get this, a SUH-WHEAT turquoise suede and black leather, grommet studded kidney shaped/oblong purse...
When I arrived at the door...oh wait, I have to tell you about these clogs....$290 originally (as I recall)...HUGE sale at Belk in South Park and the shoes are marked down...WAY DOWN....so, again, these are Michael Kors shoes (I am hyperventilating a bit)....Got the register and the salesclerk charges me $10.90...you heard it...$10.90 for the MK shoes...OMG...well, I thought they were more but didn't say anything (but many Hail Marys to assuage the guilt knowing I should've been charged more)...well, we got the shoes home, they should have charged me $49.99 for the shoes...STILL, I would've paid that for the shoes...they are so sassy....I've overpaid for many items in that store so I have done my penence...right? Work with me...back to story....
Okay, with bare feet, I arrived at my destination and promptly dropped the shoes, slid my feet in and rang the doorbell...The crowd was so impressed that I walked all that way in my Michael Kors shoes, with food, my sassy purse and didn't break a sweat (RIGHT, CROWD?) Okay, I was sweaty, flustered and walked in and no one was there but heard the constant drone of Corn Hole going on so I knew that at least THIS time, I didn't get the party date wrong -- I was a bit confused by either the Memorial Day, Labor Day or Love Your Neighbor Day party that goes on each year...Planned to show up the following day (oops?) Well, everyone was out on the deck when I arrived (save the Cornhole junkies!)... It was awesome (of course, I showed everyone my shoes...)
Oh, rewind a bit to earlier in the evening....while I was deciding what shoes I would wear to the party (was actually looking for some FABULOUS animal print ankle boot numbers - I think they may be my favorite pair of shoes ever)...I get a call...I note the time, it is after 8 p.m. I am thinking Kelly, "Party Host Extraordinaire" is calling to see where the heck I am...No, it's Cynthia, Miss"Other Party Host Extraordinaire/Shoe Lover/TN VOLUNTEER - Bleeds Orange"....the first words out of her mouth...."Mary, just wanted to make sure you did not need to be on suicide watch." I am thinking, "She caught my vibe...I can't find my favorite, gasp, pair of shoes EVER..." I have loads of shoes under the bed and simply did not have enough time to go through them all...Thank GOD for Michael Kors...Then, I hung up, grabbed the stash and started trodding my way uphill (both ways) to the party....it suddenly dawned on me, "OOOOOOHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOO! Mr. Bill!" Okay, not really....any of you who do not "get" THIS reference need to grab those pull-ups, the blankie and GO TO BED...AGAIN, you are toooo young to get this whole shoedawgshoe thing! Back to reality -- I really said, "OOOOOOOHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! The Dawgs are losing...to Vandy....that would be Vanderbilt....that would be depressing...." The whole night, I thought the Dawgs had met their demise (along with LSU - versus Kentucky -- ...in 3 overtimes...) But I kept my red-and-black- bleeding, SUH-WHEAT- leather- biker- jacket-wearing, Michael Kors shoes donning-head held high...
Fast forward, so I trod home merrily (really!), supporting my Bulldawg Nation to the hilt and finally lay my head down and wake up to a phone call at 4:30 a.m.....Devon wanting to spend the night at a friend's house...after figuring out the ploy at that early a time in the morning - I called him back THREE times and he finally got his rear end home....
I head to the Cub Scout campsite this morning with the bad news....And, Nolan was sooooo down....couldn't understand HOW we could lose to Vandy...I was dragging my bulldawg tail too today...UNTIL....Mimi and Pop called and long story short, informed us that the DAWGS pulled it out...no time left....kicked a field goal....it was up.....it was GOOOOOOOOOOD! 20-17 win...It was "OUTSTANDING!" as Mark put it...well, the Bulldawg Nation is very happy tonight (especially the one that resides in Fort Mill, South Carolina)....and when I found out the news...was donning some sweet Indian beaded flip-flops - Does my ignorance make me a bad fan? .... Talk amongst yourselves!
Shoes, victory...both are a great thing!
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