Flashback to High School...He Was Singing to ME!

Last night, I was catapulted back into the 1980s and high school (and before) as I attended "The Police" concert...my absolute FAVORITE band in high school (along with U2). I was firmly convinced I would marry Sting (Uh, he wrote "Don't Stand So Close to Me" about me, right? I was in high school...). I just couldn't quite figure out how to get rid of the wife...

Fast forward to November 15, 2007, Charlotte, North Carolina, and even though he had the flu the night before in Philly and they had to cancel his, I mean their show, the show went on for me. I know he was singing to me (my friend Debbie told me so...She kept hearing him slip "Mary Mac" into the lyrics - I have a tendency to believe her). And wow! What a performance..."Wrapped Around Your Finger"... again, to me! The entire set -- sung to me, it was!

Then, with the encore (they had TWO - one with 4 songs and then a final song), I felt compelled to stand up as they belted out "Roxanne!" My Mark and Debbie stood up with me...I did become a little verklempt for a moment several times during the show but Roxanne was particularly moving...(okay, so it's theme is a bit shady but it is a CLASSIC -- remember Eddie Murphy? I rest my case)...They were incredible.

Sting looked absolutely amazing with a capital "Zing." Mark kept reminding me he was there (for moral support of course)...Wow, Sting was....well, WOW!...Did I tell you he sang to me?

Oh, I did wear some sassy low cut black boots with jewel embellishments on the side...Very fun shoes! And, look for Shoe of the Week (it's late but I had to emotionally prepare for my face to big screen meeting with Sting....) and my update on the FANTASTIC trip to Athens last week when my Dawgs kicked some Auburn Tiger tail!

Did I mention, he sang to me last night?

SHOE OF THE WEEK - Let's Get Sappy Y'all!

This week has been a good one...relatively speaking...Despite prepping for a colonoscopy...Takes the saying "Smooth move exlax" to a whole other level...I digress! Fabulous results - I passed with flying colors without even studying...yeah! Still on the every three year plan but much better than last go round...=)!

And, Pop is doing GREAT...like he would do otherwise, right? Will be out of the hospital tomorrow likely kicking his heels up of his fancy schmancy SAS shoes...! Okay, he doesn't get Donald J. Pliner or Stuart Weitzman or Marc Jacobs....He does understand Florsheim and Bostonians and yes, SAS shoes now....I think he still has his "Ground Casey's" (his version of the Air Jordans)....Okay, in his grogginess after surgery yesterday, he insisted Mark and I take the tickets for UGA v. Auburn - he can't stand the thought of two great tickets going to waste...He reiterated that sentiment today when he was totally lucid...What is a Dawg fan to do? (besides convincing her husband that we are not taking advantage of the situation!)

So in celebration of our good fortune and great medical results this week, I have to get all sappy on you....Shoe of the Week...my wedding shoes (along with all of the beautiful hair do-dads...now that sounds classy!) And you can see our picture too - I am also very grateful for having such a wonderful husband...he could cut down on the snoring (and flatulence) at night but other than that, he's darn near perfect! (I am pretty sure he doesn't read the blog so no worries about him being mortified!)

I love these shoes, love the hair do-dads and loved the day! Okay, next week, no sappiness!

THE BULLDAWG NATION ROCKS! And "Hats Off!" to Other Teams!

I got so verklempt last week after the UGA/Florida game -- I couldn't talk about it I was sooooo thrilled at the trouncing --- pummeling ---- and sheer dominance that was displayed -- the gridiron will never be the same....The Dawgs came, they saw and they cut off that Gator tail! Did you see the bench-clearing first touch down? NOW THAT is what I am talking about sistas (and brothas too)...FINALLY, we stood up proudly and laid claim on the field in front of Dawg fans, Gator fans and the city of Jacksonville...Urban ( I prefer to call him "RURAL" - at UF, they have a tendency to be a little backwards....) Meyer we had your number and guess what, if you think this is just a one time thing, uh, think again..

Troy gave us a challenge last weekend but you have to remember -- they have not lost a game in their division and had the same record as us as well...And, by the way, they played Arkansas, Florida and Oklahoma State and they BEAT Oklahoma State handily by a score of 41-23...

And hats off to the Tennessee Volunteers AND the Arkansas Razorbacks (don't gasp)....They showed those University of Sorry Chickens and the SS who was boss...Notice he no longer dons the sunvisor...I think it has FINALLY dawned on him that at night, the sun does not shine...hello?

AND the Crimson Tide lost a hard hitting game to those LSU Tigers...last weekend, the luckiest team in college football...they can breathe a sigh of relief but those Elephants shouldn't get their trunks out of joint...they were the better team on the field on Saturday!

And how bout them Noles? Great game -- loved to see them knock off Boston College from their overinflated rating of #2 in the country...Did you see the BC fans? They were stunned....Not me...I predicted it and salute Bobby Bowden and his team for showing up, playing hard and cleaning some BC clock....

I LOVE COLLEGE FOOTBALL! I LOVE SHOES!
Go Dawgs, Go Shoes, Peace out! (okay, now that I am rapidly approaching a milestone age, I feel compelled to get in touch with my "cool" side...somehow...I don't....think ....it's working....)

Let's try it again - Go Dawgs, Go Shoes, Ciao y'all! (that's more like it!)

Halloween Soiree and the Aftermath...

Okay, first off...I wore GREAT boots last night...Donald J. Pliner boots...I think I told you about these -- outrageously expensive originally...$29.99 in Asheville...black with reflective silver stripes down the side, pointy toes...to die for! And, I wore my shirt that said "Witchy" on it...Casey's response, "Oh, how appropriate." Nice there missy, well, I oughta..... I did have a witches hat adorned with feathers and silver (to match my shoes, hello?) AND a broom stick with flowing silver "bristles"... LOVED IT....

And our cul-de-sac party/candy distribution soiree...MORE food than a whole army could eat...I alone brought 4 pounds of shrimp (with dip), a HUGE crock pot of Lil' Smokies, Egg Rolls (with dip), Vegetable Crudite and 5 dozen cookies...We had food galore! Don't get me started on the "tiff" about giving away food .... Let's just say, when I make lots of food, I want anyone and everyone to enjoy it...END OF STORY...

Pedro, I mean Nolan, was hysterical and so "on" last night...When asked where his Tater Tots were, he promptly corrected the person and said, "Uh, Napoleon carries Tater Tots. If I had anything, it would be a cake." Not seen the movie? You don't understand ... this is totally out in left field. For those Napoleon officianados...you so get this!

And, I discovered neighbors (okay they live around the corner in another cul-de-sac) who ALSO love "The Office" AND SEC Football...And, they are moving...Darn....Kindred spirits, we discover one another and then poof, they're gone...

Casey was a cat...an alley cat nonetheless but a cat...Jessa was what I would classify as a street walker...WAS supposed to be a witch and then decided to don a halter dress with 4 inch heels - before I could catch her going out the door...I probably could've gotten her but figured she'd break a leg before she got down the the bottom of the hill on our walking trail...NICE...But, before they left, her "friend" -- was fighting for the mirror as he had spiked his hair and wanted to catch a glimpse....can you say, prima donna (is there a word for a male prima donna?)... Priceless moment...male species fighting over the mirror with a female species...I probably should've contacted CNN....Devon went as Devon with his girlfriend attached at his hip...Was amusing as he took her home and came back -- the monsterous thump of bass and rock music was heard throughout the cul-de-sac, pulsing from the mini-van...the mini-van...Let me say it again...the mini-van...Does that constitute an oxymoron? Cool rock music and a mini-van? Talk amongst yourselves!

SHOE OF THE WEEK - Totally Random

There is no reason that I selected these shoes for my blog...Just like them, LOVE the shot (thanks Karen) and hey, the are Harley Davidson boots (it's ridin' weather, y'all)...Why do I have these boots? Well, I have Lucky Magazine's book "The Lucky Shopping Manual." One of the editors, Andrea Linnett, had these cool beat up biker boots that she wears everywhere and she features in the book...Well, attempting to be fashion forward, I bought these boots...And, they are sweet....AND they were on sale on zappos.com. Wish I had these boots when I really rode a Harley....There's nothing like riding a Harley - I really do wish I had one...Sorry mom! Back to shoes...I wear these when I saddle up for a trail ride, hike cross country or lounge sleepily atop my Chevy truck...oh, sorry, that's a sappy commercial...I just really like these boots and must find opportunities to wear them more often...They could become one of my signature pieces, right?

HAD to share!

Saw a great quote today and just had to share:

"All I want is peace on earth and really cute shoes."

Stop and ponder....Is that not profound?

Brought a huge lump to my throat...someone understands how I feel...It's quite overwhelming...We are kindred spirits...Unfortunately, the quote was unattributed...So I am calling out to you, you enlightened peace loving shoe maven! Please contact me, wherever you are....I think we were separated at birth...

This week...SUHWEET! But need more time to talk about my DAWGS - We took a big stilhetto...okay not really...we took a cleat - functionable yet fashionable - (how's that?) to some Gator hide this weekend...oh and, Nation Ford High School Band ROCKS (I have embraced my inner-band geek), SHOE OF THE WEEK and loads of other happenings around my somewhat mundane (HA!) life...

AND - Happy Halloween to everyone! Of course I will be wearing some sassy shoes tonight for our annual cul-de-sac candy distribution party...Lots of great food, laughs and of course, candy distribution going on! Nolan is going as "Pedro" from Napoleon Dynamite - moustache, bolo tie and all...Did a costume test run last night for an event at the high school and I almost collapsed from laughing so hard...The wig was itchy but the boy stuck it out! I am not seeing a moustache in his future - too much work, he said! HA! Jessa and Casey are going to a party as a witch and cat (screetching MEOW!)...So in character - not a stretch for them whatsoever...Devon, is uh....Well, it's his 18th birthday so I think he is being himself - a typical 18 year old boy, completely defiant, is ticked that he is driving his dad's van because his car is in the shop and thinks that french fries are a vegetable....Frosty's are made of milk so they are dairy, right? Should be very pleasant to be around tonight, I am sure...

More later...

"Life is short...Buy the shoes!"

THE OFFICE...."THE" Show...

I may have mentioned before that I love this show but just in case I haven't -- I LOVE "THE OFFICE!" It's set in my birthplace, Scranton, PA...Coincidence? I think not...Everyone in and from Scranton is HILARIOUS...I may be the one exception....And, the show mirrors my entire corporate experience and is absolutely hysterical...I know people from Scranton who so fit the characters too...Check out the website AND, GET THIS...THIS Friday, they are having an Office Party in...you guessed it, Scranton! Al Roker will be there amongst other celebs...Am wondering if my cousins and Aunt will make an appearance...=)! I so wish I had a ticket to be there...Who could not laugh at Dwight Shrute and Michael Scott?...This show is truly is a sitcom masterpiece...okay, I am biting my lip and getting verklempt...I...truly....love....this...show...

http://www.nbc.com/The_Office/

PS - "My Name is Earl" is HYSTERICAL too... Watch it! The season is over but "Rock of Love" also rocked...well, not in the same space as "The Office" or "My Name is Earl" -- okay, it was entertaining in a "Can you believe these people exist?" sordid kind of way. I have started watching the "I Love New York II" sequel (and "The Hills")....Is there hope for me? I view it as a social experiment for me in the (again) "Can you believe these people exist?" kind of way. Okay...these shows are very entertaining too...Is there hope for me?

SHOE(S) OF THE WEEK....

Enjoy the Parade of Shoes...113 pair in all (actually, I have misplaced a couple of pair so the number would be larger...I am thinking the extra shoes are in the attic, maybe?)

Uh, can you see why the neighbors think I am crazy? Although, the one redeeming thing for us? No crossbar hotel action here with our kids...although just give it time...Dear Lord, let's hope not!

Do People Normally Get Taken to the Pokey After a Tupperware Party?

Apparently at my Tupperware Party's they do...I know what you are thinking...one of the rowdy attendees got mad because she was not allowed to "burp" the super-duper-ultra-super-duper mixing bowl with a lid and clocked the consultant...Sorry to disappoint...Let me clarify...

So, most of the guests had left and the consultant was packing up her things to leave after a successful party (YAY!) Well, during the party, I had heard chattering from several attendees about a strange person sitting in the middle of our cul-de-sac on Saturday afternoon (we were gone all day)...well, low and behold, said strange man - actually "boy" (covered in tattoos) was sitting smack dab in the middle of our cul-de-sac after the party, a few beer bottles at his side, whittling a piece of wood...NICE! I am sure that was well received by my attendees...do I live in a neighborhood or "THE" hood? You make the call...

Hmmmm...well, after several attempts to lure him from the street (whose idea was that ladies? Not mine but I tried...) Whitling knife in hand, probably not our greatest "Einstein" moment...But, I must say, I was very close to getting him to go home (which by the way is the home of his mother's boyfriend a few doors down from our house...) When I asked him his name, he told me, "Able." Hmmmm - reference to Cain and Able, maybe? Not his name by the way...He did tell me he was heading to California on December 22...the significance of the date...not quite sure.... Well, the cops were called while "Cul-de-sac Chair Boy" was in using the facilities...I spoke with Fort Mill's finest and told them where he went and long story short, the whitling fiend/tattoo officianado was (HANDCUFFED - I couldn't have staged this if I tried) placed in the back of the law's cruiser and headed for the cross-bar hotel... My guess is a certain variety of cannibas was found in his room (enough to harvest is my guess)...or the party vile...hmmm, hard to tell...both would not surprise me!

Did I tell you we were observing the whole human experiment on our soccer chairs, in the front yard sipping from the Waterford Crystal?...I always know how to throw a classy soiree. And, I was wearing some very sassy zebra print shoes...first time worn, but not the last...

Can't wait to find out what I qualified for after my party...Gotta love Tupperware...I wonder if they make burpable shoe boxes...Am curious to see if they have come out with a UGA-line too...
Go shoes! Go Dawgs! Go really fancy cake holder doo-dads!

PS - Before I forget - I must give a shout out to my hubby for making some great food too -- in addition to the Pineapple Upside-down cake that Victoria made in 12 minutes in the microwave (yes, bite your lip - brings a tear to your eye -- it was fantastic!), Mark made mini pitas filled with homemade chicken salad, homemade hummus with pita slices, vegetable crudite, shrimp, egg rolls and mini tacos...Muy bueno mi amor! And guess what the napkins had on them??? I'll keep you guessing...(hint: They were sassy!)

Is my life REALLY real? No one could make this up, do you think? Talk amongst yourselves...

CHECK IT OUT...SEC AND THE CITY

Check out SEC and the City...On the right side of the blog! ENJOY and GO DAWGS!

NEWSFLASH: Astonishing News Just Revealed

You are the first to hear it...I have found out I have a long lost son who is being raised just minutes from my house by two very loving parents (and he has a younger brother). "Nate" as he is called is a wonderfully talented child (what would you expect?) and excels at just about everything. He is a senior in high school (like Devon) and has just gotten his driver's license...and get this....He just got a job TODAY at....of all places....Off Broadway Shoes...It brings a tear to a mother's eyes...The family discount I will get makes a lump well in my throat...

Okay, so he's not my son...he could learn to be. Photographer extraordinaire and admitted-only-owns-five-pair-of-shoes-but-wants-to-be-a-shoe lover (ha!) Karen's son just got a job at the shoe mecca...I am torn between euphoria for her (FINALLY - HE GOT A JOB) and sheer agony (WHY, WENDY'S DEVON, WHY?) Think of the discounts just waiting to be taken but going by the wayside...This travesty mustn't happen...Karen, you MUST begin to love shoes or turn over custody of Nate to me for the brief moments my feet hit OBS (until I get the discount!) and then, he's your son again...okay, don't be looking for any child support now...

Does he realize what a sweet job he has? .... shoe discounts, shoes, purses (okay, that's a stretch) -- ah that is the life...At least he doesn't have to wear a uniform, smell like Bacon Cheeseburgers and Biggie fries and wear a visor like Steve Spurrier. We don't even get a free Frostie out of the deal. WHY DEVON WHY?

Good luck Nate! Your loving mom MARY (that's M-A-R-Y)

Shoe of the Week: Where Urban Meets the Jungle

Photo by: Karen "She's gonna learn to love shoes" Paulson

Can you believe it? Shoe of the Week is finally here!

Get the title? - The urban (the manhole and the modern design of the shoes) and the jungle (the vines and the animal print ON the shoes)...okay, maybe it's a stretch but I like the sound of it. The story behind these shoes: They are the favorite in my collection! Number one out of 113 pair! (Okay, that is beween 947 and 2,587 pair less than Imelda Marcos, thank you very much) These Antonio Melani shoes are made of real animal hair (sorry PETA) and were originally $139.99. I picked them up for a sweet bargain of $29.99 at Dillards. Why the price reduction on these shoes? Who has the guts to wear them? UH, that would be ME! Everywhere I go, I get compliments on these shoes (perhaps people do that because they are scared what I might do to them - uh, only someone with outrageous taste would wear these glorious boots). These shoes are insane(ly wonderful!) The only thing that would make them even more glorious would be if they were RED and black...Are you listening Antonio Melani? Go Dawgs! Life's short - Enjoy the shoes!

My life - sitcom or tragedy (you decide) and other stuff (like shoes...I am getting verklempt)

So I spend most of the morning yesterday dodging right and left verbal uppercuts from a triad of ungrateful ingrates (okay, can you tell I have not slept in a while?) But I like that phrase...triad of ungrateful ingrates...NOTE TO SELF: Copyright this phrase... Then, I spend 1 1/2 blistering hours gathering up Scout stuff and camping stuff and stuff stuff for an overnight Cub Scout campout that (darn ! It was supposed to be in the upper 30s last night) I can't attend because I have to be home with our teenagers (uh, this is a sincere DARN).

Luckily, (sincere DARN) I was able to go out and do some activities with the Cub Scouts, Mark and the other parents. Fishing, cooking and lots of laughs and learning with the boys. I got a chance to reminisce about actually catching a tree with my fishing line and literally reeling a boat...maybe not so much a boat, more of a canoe with a motor...into the shore...It really was nice...So, I got home with smoke filled, but nicely straightened hair if I do say so myself. SIDE BAR: Okay, I did it on my own without Mark's help...I mean without my hairdresser's help or was it my girlfriend's help or?...okay, most of you know it already...My husband USUALLY straightens my hair...I am weaning myself from that and branching out on my own and doing pretty darn good at it too - at least so I think, well maybe...I digress.

So then, I know I have a party to go to sans Mark in the neighborhood (Thank God it was in the neighborhood, because Devon's car is kaput, Mark had the Suburban, Devon had the van and I had two feet that were made for walking)...FORGOT, that I had no mode of transportation to get something to bring to the party...So while staring at mounds of Ramen noodle packages (that is SOOO college party hors d'oeuvres, but hey, we are all still young - why not channel our youth, right?)...I found a bag of tortilla chips, salsa in the fridge (I combined several jars in a tupperware container to make it appear to be homemade - sorry Kelly!) AND boiled a pound (just one pound - egads) of shrimp with Old Bay seasoning (I did have to call Mark at the camp site to get directions on how to make this) ... NOTE TO SELF: Mark is not allowed to attend any events when there is an important party going on...He's the chef de jour -- uh, that's every day by the way -- I would have had loads of stuff to bring had he been here to actually "cook and run" ...Although, perhaps that is okay. I would've literally needed a pack mule to haul our usual party foods....

Back to me...I proceeded to get ready and walk the oh 1/4 mile or so to the party donning my black leather biker jacket with zippers (Oh, it has such ZIP - I LOVE IT!) and Michael Kors (okay, I am welling up with tears) beautiful, animal hair clogs...2nd time they have been worn....okay, didn't actually wear the clogs while walking...in a true show of class and intelligence, I carried said clogs in my right hand, while donning a Harris Teeter bag filled with my contribution to the party AND...get this, a SUH-WHEAT turquoise suede and black leather, grommet studded kidney shaped/oblong purse...

When I arrived at the door...oh wait, I have to tell you about these clogs....$290 originally (as I recall)...HUGE sale at Belk in South Park and the shoes are marked down...WAY DOWN....so, again, these are Michael Kors shoes (I am hyperventilating a bit)....Got the register and the salesclerk charges me $10.90...you heard it...$10.90 for the MK shoes...OMG...well, I thought they were more but didn't say anything (but many Hail Marys to assuage the guilt knowing I should've been charged more)...well, we got the shoes home, they should have charged me $49.99 for the shoes...STILL, I would've paid that for the shoes...they are so sassy....I've overpaid for many items in that store so I have done my penence...right? Work with me...back to story....

Okay, with bare feet, I arrived at my destination and promptly dropped the shoes, slid my feet in and rang the doorbell...The crowd was so impressed that I walked all that way in my Michael Kors shoes, with food, my sassy purse and didn't break a sweat (RIGHT, CROWD?) Okay, I was sweaty, flustered and walked in and no one was there but heard the constant drone of Corn Hole going on so I knew that at least THIS time, I didn't get the party date wrong -- I was a bit confused by either the Memorial Day, Labor Day or Love Your Neighbor Day party that goes on each year...Planned to show up the following day (oops?) Well, everyone was out on the deck when I arrived (save the Cornhole junkies!)... It was awesome (of course, I showed everyone my shoes...)

Oh, rewind a bit to earlier in the evening....while I was deciding what shoes I would wear to the party (was actually looking for some FABULOUS animal print ankle boot numbers - I think they may be my favorite pair of shoes ever)...I get a call...I note the time, it is after 8 p.m. I am thinking Kelly, "Party Host Extraordinaire" is calling to see where the heck I am...No, it's Cynthia, Miss"Other Party Host Extraordinaire/Shoe Lover/TN VOLUNTEER - Bleeds Orange"....the first words out of her mouth...."Mary, just wanted to make sure you did not need to be on suicide watch." I am thinking, "She caught my vibe...I can't find my favorite, gasp, pair of shoes EVER..." I have loads of shoes under the bed and simply did not have enough time to go through them all...Thank GOD for Michael Kors...Then, I hung up, grabbed the stash and started trodding my way uphill (both ways) to the party....it suddenly dawned on me, "OOOOOOHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOO! Mr. Bill!" Okay, not really....any of you who do not "get" THIS reference need to grab those pull-ups, the blankie and GO TO BED...AGAIN, you are toooo young to get this whole shoedawgshoe thing! Back to reality -- I really said, "OOOOOOOHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! The Dawgs are losing...to Vandy....that would be Vanderbilt....that would be depressing...." The whole night, I thought the Dawgs had met their demise (along with LSU - versus Kentucky -- ...in 3 overtimes...) But I kept my red-and-black- bleeding, SUH-WHEAT- leather- biker- jacket-wearing, Michael Kors shoes donning-head held high...

Fast forward, so I trod home merrily (really!), supporting my Bulldawg Nation to the hilt and finally lay my head down and wake up to a phone call at 4:30 a.m.....Devon wanting to spend the night at a friend's house...after figuring out the ploy at that early a time in the morning - I called him back THREE times and he finally got his rear end home....

I head to the Cub Scout campsite this morning with the bad news....And, Nolan was sooooo down....couldn't understand HOW we could lose to Vandy...I was dragging my bulldawg tail too today...UNTIL....Mimi and Pop called and long story short, informed us that the DAWGS pulled it out...no time left....kicked a field goal....it was up.....it was GOOOOOOOOOOD! 20-17 win...It was "OUTSTANDING!" as Mark put it...well, the Bulldawg Nation is very happy tonight (especially the one that resides in Fort Mill, South Carolina)....and when I found out the news...was donning some sweet Indian beaded flip-flops - Does my ignorance make me a bad fan? .... Talk amongst yourselves!

Shoes, victory...both are a great thing!

Okay, so am I a Valley Girl or what? Boys fashion (or lack thereof) AND just a college football observation

Okay, so I was just reading some of my blog entries and realize I say "okay" a lot...Does that make me a person aspiring to be a Valley Girl or what? Do you remember Valley Girls? If you don't, you are way too young to be reading this blog, so go put on your pullups, grab the blankie and go to bed - it's past your bedtime...OMG I think I am one. I did have the Valley Girl handbook and perhaps some of the sayings are indelibly etched in my mind...that's such a groddy thought though, totally...

Okay (see there I go again...) so it was Fall Festival today at Nolan's school ... AND, I did my civic duty -- Okay, (again, ugh!) Mark and I did beyond the civic duty -- got accosted by a lady (that's a stretch) whose kid lost his ride punch card -- uh, is it my fault your kid, oh, how should I put this delicately for those pull-up wearing people who don't remember Valley Girls? --okay, so lady (again, I use that term loosely) maybe he has his head up a certain posterior area? I knew the kid in preschool -- to say he was clueless is a complete compliment...Mark found the card though and not a thank you was given to him whatsoever...I am hoping she is at home now trying to pull her son's head and her own out of said posterior region...

Then, (I didn't say Okay! woo hoo!) a loving grandmother proceeded to put her 2 year old (or younger) child on the inflatable "ride..." okay, mind you, this had a probably 8 foot climbing wall with an equally long slide...she was by herself...I must get grandma with irate mom and perhaps they both can assist one another in getting their heads out of their tushies...Back to story...Well the child, DUH????, got scared halfway up the wall (heck, I'd be bugging out at 18-inches above the bounciness) and proceeded to climb down. I held her hand and brought her to the end of the "ride" to meet her grandmother and her mom...I told them what happened and they gasped, "She was scared?" Okay add this mom to the head extraction process...Uh, yes she was -- DUH?! Well, grandma turned to me and said, "Well, do I get my punch back since she didn't go through the ride?" Okay, look lady...the flippin' sign said 6 punches for the ride...I punched the card once saving your butt some money...Luckily, Mark (not in a stellar mood today by the way) turned around to her and said, "Okay (he gets that from me) uh, you want a punch back?...let me see if I can find one of the fraction of an inch pieces of paper and we will super glue it on for you." To which the mom promptly answered, "Don't worry about it..." I am with Nancy S. ...Miss Blue Hair was trying to work the Florida chard angle and we just weren't going for it...Did I tell you we worked the ride for more than 1 1/2 hours?...we were supposed to be there 45 minutes - our replacements never showed up...I am thinking they observed the ribbings we got from 2 moms and grandma and said, "No thanks!" NOTE TO SELF: DO NOT volunteer to "man" a booth at Fall Festival unless you are prepared to bring out the super, duper head vices to surgically remove craniums from gluteal regions...By the way, Nancy and Larry...LOVED prolonging your ticket agony by only charging your kids one punch per ride - I think I may have let them go through free too (evil laugh)...I went through ticket agony with my kids and loved sharing the joy with you!

So Nolan goes to the Fall Festival too...we come home and I realized the kid (who also wears two different socks to school) has his shirt on backwards (you can see the "tag" through his shirt)...I said, "NOLAN...HONEY...you have your shirt on backwards and everyone is able to tell that." To which he promptly replies to me, "Mom, only you, Stacy and Clinton ("What Not to Wear") would notice that."...I had no rebuttal. I think he might be right...Do you think he watches too much TV or observes fashion, shoes, etc., too much ? (wish he would pick up some clues)...SIDE BAR: He know how to polish shoes -- uh, what? Casey had to polish her ugh-lee band shoes today...oh y'all ugly can't even describe them -- they make orthopedic shoes look hot...Nolan knew what to do from observing the shoe shine shops at the airports...He has always said he wanted to be a pilot but do you think he likes airports because he likes to watch shoes being shined?...talk amongst yourselves...

I am happy to report that I do believe (thankfully) UGA has a seating arrangement for its players on the sidelines during football season...Unlike a certain team which will remain unnamed because they were the TOP party school (UGA was second) this year...I have got to look out for those upstanding schools espousing comeraderie amongst its students...Well, at unmentioned school, Mr. Dingle and Mr. Berry were photographed next to one another on the bench...hmmmm...But UGA does have a building that is called the "Butts-Meher (pronounced MEER)" building...say it fast. Not pretty...So I guess I can't rest on my seating laurels...am very glad for our seating chart on the sidelines though.

EXCITING NEWS -- Drum Roll Please - Shoe of the Week is Coming Soon! And Xylophone (sp?) injuries...

I am so excited to announce that on Tuesday, October 16, 2007, Shoe of the Week WILL be launched (not lunch(ed) as was on the sign in "The Office" tonight - don't you love the show? Set in my birthplace, Scranton, PA...)...Back to shoes! I will be doing multiple photoshoots with my shoes this weekend so brace yourselves...we will be doing on location shoots all around the area (okay, Fort Mill...unless I get a wild hair and take some of my super shoes on the road-- okay, on location shoots out of Fort Mill are not beyond the realm of possibility!)...

Okay, you know what I realized today? My sandals need some work...Apparently I kick up a fair amount of dirt (that accumulates on the inside of my HOT sandals -EW!) Soap, water, toothbrush and a lot of elbow grease will hopefully do the trick to rectify the sandal scandal! AND, I am debating the "in season" versus "off season" premiers...What do you think? Your thoughts on this topic are appreciated...it will affect whether I pull out the Fall features OR I just keep the Spring/Summer shoes in the forefront...It's been so hot lately BUT today was so cool...I am leaning toward in-season features...Again, talk amongst yourselves and report back to me! This will require some activity...Fall shoes are under our (stilhetto lifted) bed...had to do that to accomodate my collection of feet apparel.

Okay, xylophone injuries...Apparently one of the instructors assisting with the Nation Ford High School Marching Band sustained a xylophone (YES - a xylophone) injury recently. And, while showing the students the injury, developed an infection from showing it....EW!!!! He's back to work this week much to Casey's chagrin...Am I the only one who is experiencing BELLY LAUGHS at this one...? I get amused at the slightest thing and this one takes the cake... I feel so bad for being so giddy with laughter at this one!...I have that same experience when other people fall...I am warped, I know it....I would expect the same reaction if I fell or again, hmmmmm, maybe sustained oh, maybe a XYLOPHONE INJURY! Okay, I think I sustained a Zither injury in my youth...do you remember the Zither...you could develop some wicked "rug burn" type injuries on your pick fingers/hand, admit it....

Can't wait for the Shoe of the Week!

WAY TO GO ST. THOMAS AQUINAS GIRLS' SCHOOL KNITTING TEAM - AND SOCKS!

A big shout out goes out to the St. Thomas Aquinas Middle School Girls' Knitting Team who showed up to play the Tennessee Volunteers in place of the mightly Bulldawgs this Saturday night...They did great! Apparently, the entire Bulldawg team was on vacation...Uh, what? While ALL of our receivers, offensive and defensive lines were filing their nails and getting facials, the Vols showed up, kicked our butts and took names... To add insult to injury, Larry Munson was not calling the game either...EGADS! Way to go girls! Are there any scholarships that are in jeopardy as a result of the playing? (or lack thereof)...I was taking away scholarships left and right on Saturday afternoon -- Being fiscally responsible is a great thing, ya know? Well, unlike the Shamecocks, at least our players show up to class...it would really help if they showed up to the game as well!

On a positive note, we had a great time at a Tennessee/Georgia party (on neutral ground)....Our TN buds were so classy at not rubbing it in...okay, I am not sure I could show so much restraint although I think I could (but hey, we didn't win so who knows? Perhaps I would be the epitome of class too...talk amongst yourselves on this one - could I do it?)...Nolan reminded me that I was not yelling (or cursing) as much as I usually do during a game (lovely he has that impression of me)...okay, I had to show Southern/SEC manners, right? I think Cynthia and Hack (they bleed orange) were told the same thing by their boys as well (no curse bombs were flying - who knew that could happen)...Hostess Kelly remained neutral -- although, I did get the sympathetic glance on more than one occasion...

SIDE NOTE: Cynthia and I BOTH brought a cake to the party...basically the same cake too (unbeknownst to us) -- with the Georgia and Tennessee logos! I guess that's what you do at a "Cake Party" (okay - it was really more of a "KEG" party)....in Mimi's words...Cake and Keg are interchangable in Mimi's vocabulary...amongst other words...

Okay on a positive note...I DID learn how to play Cornhole...while Cynthia and I were cheering one another on (and high fiving each other too) we were informed we were actually playing against one another...WHAT? ....hmmmm....the high fiving stopped and we promptly got our game face on...And, MY virtuous husband (remember golf?) tried to cheat Kelly and I out of a point during a game - AFTER I figured out the scoring system...you have GOT to watch the quiet ones...they are not to be trusted...Who knows how many points that he credited to his team versus mine before I "got it?!" He could have thrown me a bone (a Dawg bone) because my Dawgs were getting beat....BUT NO! He had to win...the score was announced by him after every toss...He's an engineer but sometimes the math thing (ahem) doesn't come so easy...points are added at a whim...I still love Cornhole...Note to self: Play on Mark's team, especially when others are imbibing...I will always win!

Okay, I did get in the bounce house too...broke my elbow in 8th grade in one of those but decided to face my fear and bounce with a bunch of boys! Okay, long story short, I squealed like a girl (okay, I am one) but even their 50-70 pound bodies were a formidable force against my unmentionable girth! They were catapulting me to the ceiling...I went down to the mat a couple of times (peeled my face off of the heavy-duty plastic) but my feable heart couldn't take it....I have been experiencing latent elbow pain every since...who knows how much therapy the boys will need seeing my stomach meeting my chin ...not pretty at all...

Did I tell you Cynthia wore the sweetest shoes? Awesome animal print flats with a quilted patent leather toe...To die for...again, in an amazing show of class, I was given permission by her to purchase the same pair (if I can find them!) $22 bucks at Target...okay, don't rush the stores...let me get mine first please!

Okay, you are dying to hear about socks, right? This is the email I sent to my friends late last week:

"For those of you in the FMES carpool line today, yes Nolan was wearing two different socks. Yes, I realize it and am mortified. Yes, I need to go to the laundromat to clean his socks since our washing machine is kaput (although he has clean, matching ones up in his sock drawer that is labeled “Socks and Boxers” – duh!) and Yes, he doesn’t care…one sock has an emblem on it, the other doesn’t so you can’t miss it and he’s wearing a plaid shirt that is clashing with everything…I think I am getting hives."

Should I be happy the kid doesn't care or should I be VERY afraid that he is clueless on the fashion front?....Discuss amongst yourselves...

Will the Dawgs crumble as a result of the loss?...I just want to beat the Gators...that's it! GO DAWGS!

THE DAWGS WILL RISE AGAIN...and I am getting those sassy flats if it kills me!

Is it poor sportsmanship to rub it in? Who cares - GOOO DAWGS!

Okay, I am euphoric! The Dawgs won in overtime in Alabama...Tuscaloosa will never be the same and I am glad for it! Tons of horrific officiating, but Georgia prevailed - Amen brother! Bama had a field goal in OT - we countered with the game winning TD and WON!!...AGAIN WOOHOO! I pledged to send fashionable eyewear to the referrees - they missed so many crucial calls and obviously need new glasses...OT might not have been necessary were it not for their calls...

Okay, what do you do to fight nervousness while watching a competitive sport on TV? -- if you don't watch sports, think about a majorly stressful event...what do you do to combat stress? Is it normal to read "InStyle" magazine during sporting events? It helped for me....great Fall shoes were a fantastic diversion from missed first downs...Great fall outfits -- a superb substitute for lack luster offensive series....special teams' play and debaucles has accessories pages all over them....InStyle Mag...instant sports therapy for me!

Okay, back to tonight's game - I was a bit inappropriate with my verb usage and volume level on the shouting (got many “hairy eyeballs” from Mark) but I am sooooo happy….Did I tell you my brother-in-law is a HUGE BAMA fan?…Nolan wanted to call him two minutes ago…I told him if he EVER wanted a birthday gift again, he would not do that at this point….the other brother-in-law of mine, is a GA TECH grad and a huge fan (sorry they lost to Virginia) – BAMA brother in law is also a Tech fan too (got his masters' degree from there)... What were my sisters thinking? Uh, they weren’t…. I have a double brother-in-law whammy and LOVE to quietly revel in the victories UGA has enjoyed…OH YEAH!….

I am so THRILLED right now (think Snoopy dance)…Nolan and I were ramming bellies – I pummeled him across the room with my wine/carb overload due to game watching nosh gut, I mean, Jazzercise firm abs – my hands are raw from the high fives and fist punches we shared…I am such a guy….Okay, Mimi and Pop? I called them screaming at the top of my lungs and they answered the phone screaming at the tops of their lungs too – so I get it honestly…it’s genetic and I am not responsible for any of this, right?

GO DAWGS – Okay we were cheering for LSU today (what?)----- That's how much we abhor SPURRIER! Mark especially…we cheer against anyone he is coaching (and Mark’s top two of worst bosses – one was an LSU grad – that says a lot for both of us today picking one side over the other!) – GO Tigers (until they play the Dawgs!) You’d think I’d cheer for the Shamecocks but no….can’t cheer for the sun visor-donning evil genius…Did you notice, the visor came off today?

Okay – LSU won, West Virginia won…Florida State had a by week and Tennessee won vs. Arkansas State! My college football loving friends are very happy! AND -- Did I mention, THE DAWGS WON! WOOO HOOO!

FL State bud – Be prepared for the Noles vs.the Crimson Tide next week – they are hurting tonight and will come out swinging – Bobby will have a plan though…! GO NOLES!

Gosh I love to win...

Be Careful What You Wish For....

Okay, life has had its ups and downs lately...very typical of a household run by mostly teenagers, right? I have learned to take the old adage to heart - be careful what you wish for...

Well, let's take our oldest...We wished for a job and more social interaction. He is quiet, not overly-involved...okay, in politically correct terms I would say he's socially stifled to put it mildly (and he would agree to a certain extent)...Let's take it back a bit...So he gets a job this summer which you know about -- at Wendy's...We almost hosted a parade through downtown Fort Mill...it only took him two years to finally take that leap of faith and join the workforce (actually, daddy paying for everything gnawed the dangling carrot to a nub pretty readily - the threat of spending all summer, caring for siblings, doing loads of housework and not getting paid - I am thinking that put the fire under the bum to get a job if you know what I mean) Well, he meets another burger flipper of the female variety and they start being "friends" (which you know about) and then they "break up" for 33.938475 hours and then got back together (I don't think you know about that)...ah, I thought I would rejoice over him finally emerging from his PS2 and seeing sunlight but now I am not so sure...The kiddy (ages 14 - 35) monestary or convent is sounding VERY positive to me right now....

Okay, then take our oldest daughter -- not terribly involved in a lot - we want her to get out more and to get more involved... so, she has been requesting guitar lessons...Santa brought her a bunch of guitar paraphernalia for Christmas...we talked and talked and talked about lessons but it just never transpired...until, she met okay we'll call him "M" for Mike - oops, that's his name...Marching Band member and guitar player. He has agreed to give her guitar lessons...Okay, it's like Stevie Nicks and Lindsay Buckingham (Whatever the Fleetwood Mac couple's names are!) in their good years - the kids like each other...But it is HILARIOUS! He tells her to play a certain chord with a certain beat -- she does it...Then, he tells her to change it to a different key...she plays the same chord, same beat...He's about to pull his hair out but politely says, "Great beat but lets try to change the chords this time..." He did this no less than ten times when I was within earshot...Casey and I sat behind the pantry door and howled -- but then, she scolded me for chuckling as she burst into giggles - I think I was called a "Mean Mom" or "Stalker Mom" or something like that....It brings me back to the family story that has lived through the ages -- My sister Joleen took guitar lessons from Sister What's-Her-Name -- well regardless of the song they were supposed to be playing or the chords or the beat, "The House of the Rising Sun" always came through loud and clear...the question to this day, did Sister What's-Her-Name know what that song was about? (Psssstttt - a house of ill repute)....we are thinking not...So Joleen played the song to different beats and tempos throughout her fledgling guitar career.... That was the only song she learned...when I hear it on the radio, it brings a chuckle and a smile to my face! Did I tell you that said guitar instructor "M" drives? --- EGADS! I am starting the kiddy monestary/convent...applications are coming soon...

Okay, the younger daughter...we continue to wish for and encourage her individuality -- having said that, she now likes the "indie" kid with an earring or two...very nice in a geeky, intellectual kind of way...funny story -- he weighed 125 pounds three years ago when he was three inches shorter...now he is at 118 or 120 at three inches taller...okay, the kid's a twig - think Flat Stanley...he plays the mellophone like the girls and hangs out with the both of them when he comes over...Band geek...(phew!) Casey has attended church with him "alone" with his family -- both girls have gone to church with him with his family as well...I am not quite worried as of yet...He thinks the girl (Casey) is weird which may be a good sign (or not)...Who knows what weird means these days?? The kiddy monestary/convent concept gets more appealing every day...

Nolan - I have wished for the very thing that he is -- EXTREMELY laid back, goes with the flow BUT...Can he not learn to put his name on his papers? --- he is getting two points taken off per test for this! He's done it multiple times this school year already -- UGH! It is driving my inner Type A Personality crazy and the Controlling part of me is trying to take over...Be careful what you wish for right? As much as I would like anal retentiveness to force him to write his name every day amongst other things, it is much more pleasant to deal with a relaxed child IF you can peel them out of the car with a spatula before school....

So Wednesday, I stayed after my class and went back to visit another instructor friend who was helping out with Child Care for that day...She had an inconsolable child in the mix and I reached out to hold the child and she came to me...and became attached to me...I tried to make the major "run for it " move and she BUSTED me and start crying again...so I stayed the whole time, enjoyed my catching up with my friend and her daughter -- well, my "buddys" little arms clinged to me and she put her head on my shoulder as I rocked her back and forth....I started to long for the days when I had a little one who appreciated me, didn't talk back, e.g., didn't talk at all, etc....How I wanted a little one at that moment...a fleeting moment....

Well, tonight, we attended the little man's parent teacher conferences -- both went really well - we are so proud of him...well, he proceeded to tell us that our neighbor, a 4th grade teacher, was expecting a child -- I told him that clearly he was wrong -- well, his "main" teacher whipped out of the classroom and said, indeed it was true...After Mark and I literally picked our jaws up from the icky school-room floor, reality set in...Now, she will have a soon to be 18 year old, a soon to be 16 year old and a soon to be 14 year old and then a new little one...They are so thrilled - me? After dodging several shotgun bullets from my husband, I would be in a catatonic state rocking back and forth and drooling....

So at this moment, I am VERY glad my fleeting wishes did not come true - what was I thinking? I don't sleep anyway and changing the litter box makes me gag...what makes me think I would get ANY sleep and how could I possibly stomach poopy diapers again....ugh. So, I will live vicariously through the neighbors, provide babysitters for the little tot AND totally enjoy being with the little bundle of joy....And, like a grandparent, be very happy to send the baby/toddler/pre-schooler/school aged child home after much spoiling!

Okay shoes and Dawgs to come!

More to Come -- Have you seen the newest shoes this season and FOOTBALL!

A quick note...

Have you seen the newest shoes this season? HOT, HOT, HOT! Shoe of the Week is going to be updated this week... We'll talk about the "new releases" soon as well as those old, tried and true standbys...

A GOOOOOO Dawgs is in order...the Dawgs took care of Western Carolina (where is that university located - do you know?)...They redeemed themselves from last weekend...

Lots of shockers this weekend - I am hoping for a Bama shocker (can you believe I am cheering for them?)...Notre Dame got pummelled by Michigan...South Bend is a very sad place to be right now - it has replaced Ann Arbor as the most horrendous place to wake up to tomorrow morning....(poor guys -- HA!!!) UCLA -- OBLITERATED by Utah - so sad....NOT! Love it - it helps the Dawgs - we will hopefully move up...Let's not discuss the Vols vs. Gators yet -- I am sooo upset about this.....Discussions will ensue at a later point....

And those Sorry Chickens - they played SC State....The score should have been 99 - 0....Spurrier is going to face a shocker, lose face loss this season guaranteed....

BAMA just defeated Arkansas...WOOHOO! The hogs were #16...I am hoping the dawgs will move up once again...

Okay, the good life has ceased to exist...the girls are home now after their band competition...cranky, ornery attitudes...I am sure I will have more to write about after we have more "conversations..."

THE DAWGS WILL RISE AGAIN, camping, the Dixie Stampede, "CHURCH" and neighbors...

Okay, for me this week...life really stunk...

But, my Bulldawg head is hanging high because I am a gracious loser (and I KNOW when we play awful and give the game away and get outplayed...you learn to say "Uncle" and move one...) Imagine if you will, being on a campout with hundreds (yes hundreds) of cub scouts and boy scouts....and KNOWING that you can't watch the Dawgs play the University of Sorry Chickens this weekend... AND, you can only speculate what the score is, the plays, everything...(it was SUPPOSED to be a technology free weekend)....

Well, on the way home from the Dixie Stampede (we will get to that later) -- AM750, WSB, could be picked up on the radio...okay, we're in the car not violating Scout regulations, right??? With Kansas (and Carolina) fans in tow, we listened (CRRZZZEWERWSMAMJOAOWJEND) to the game - that is supposed to represent the static that was present on the AM station...the Dawgs were down 10 - 3....okay - besides enduring the Stampede (great for kids, not for vegetarians...I had a greasy potato and an ear of corn for $30+ --- Mark had two whole chickens, 2 pieces of pork tenderloin, two biscuits, 2 cups of creamy vegetable soup - ok - what happened to good old fashioned no cream added vegetable soup? -- and a flaky, apple turnover with coffee...okay, I had coffee...black) - okay, no wine and beer....ARGH!

Back to story: I had to come back to the campsite all greasy and gritty and sweaty and endure the adrenaline rush of knowing my Dawgs were in trouble....I had to find a TV somewhere...luckily the 12-year-old Kansas/University of Sorry Chicken fan and his dad spotted not one but two TVs in the campground with the game a-blarrin'...I didn't care - technology free or not, I was secretly sneaking into the Suburban to listen to the raspy voice of Larry Munson...Aluminum foil on the antenna to improve the reception was not an option (DARN!)...we were camping "green"...although aluminum foil is recyclable, no one brought it...NEXT TIME - it will be a staple in our "camping wardrobe" --- my antenna idea was "FOILED" - literally and figuratively...

And then (GASP!) I resorted to sneaking up to the canopy of 6 MALE Gamecock fans (ah, it's supposed to be a technology-free weekend....THEY WERE NEGLIGENT SCOUT FATHERS - REPORT THEM, REPORT THEM!) while Mark wrestled with marshmallow-laden snotty nosed, disrespectful youngen's (not ours) AND while other "Scout" parents went off to smoke their cigarettes, curse profusely and take showers...I said hi to said "non-compliant" Scout fathers and they proceeded to greet me with the courtesy shown to other Chicken fans...AFTER, I told them they didn't want to know who I was cheering for (GO DAWGS) ...they were obliging in true Southern fashion (hello? Only because they were winning, right?) It was too much for one to handle at one time....but I returned - after the crackly scores of 13-6...16-6...16-9...16 -12 were heard on AM750...With only 1 1/2 minutes to go, what could I lose? - I had to go back -- I told them, "WE (the Bulldawg Nation) were either losing or going to pull off the big one!"....one man, resorted into a pacing panic...my tactic had worked....Make the enemy afraid, very afraid, of the unknown...I was in pace back and forth mode as well...Darn, after the the inadvertent "kick" my plan was to walk away victorious was foiled, again...But, I am pretty sure I induced a severe case of diarhea and major heart palpitations to a Shamecock fan so all is not lost....I did end the meeting with, "Okay, it may be tough waking up in Athens tomorrow morning but imagine Ann Arbor tomorrow morning...." They all agreed and we collectively agreed (again for me) that "Mr. Michigan Coach" will be on Monster.com this a.m...But darn, I so want a "do-over" game!

I came home to camp after the crushing blow and Nolan, the diehard fan, proclaimed, "I can't believe they lost mom but I REALLY can't believe you broke Scout rules and used technology..." Is that five or ten Hail Marys for me today?....

Camping was great...Nolan was absolutely stoked about it – He got to sleep in a tent with his buddies and no adults….Mark and I got to share air mattresses that were deflated by the time we woke up – it’s always so nice to have to peel your cheek off of the mattress in the morning…Actually, it works much like an epilady or laser hair removal which is not bad considering my face is growing more hairy as I age…And, on the beach, I got to pick up 100s of cigarette butts too -- no doubt, left by our noisy, "Scout" neighbors next door...and guess what? Mark found out we had cable hook up for all of our sites this morning.....I could've brought our own TV, viewing the game alone and avoiding the misery mentioned previously....oh well...for a later blog - neighboring Scout families...NO, ABSOLUTELY NO, branch in the family tree...it was kinda fun listening to a soap opera going to sleep...Mark didn't find it quite as intriguing...

Dixie Stampede -- again, not my style of food...the boys loved it and we got to watch people ride horses (fast!) ostriches (a HOOT!), pig races and then, two of our scout leaders "gallop" to victory for the South (the Gray)--- (Talking about sides, my sides were so sore from laughing sooooo hard!) The victory lap after our leaders' won had me on the floor...the victorious galloper from Pack 108 was so proud with that wooden horse galloping around the barrels...Again, I almost fell off of my chair - I need to get out more....By the way, what did we have for dinner? --- Again as mentioned - CHICKEN! I am sure it was Shamecock! WOOO HOOOO! Go Dawgs!...Of course, I didn't eat it but heard it was really good! There was plenty of pomp and circumstance afterward, mom and apple pie - Dolly Parton singing - the works...and then the phrase, "Who's Proud to be American?" was met with a loud pop-pop-pop-pop -- I hit the deck....oops, it was indoor fireworks....well, noticing the "Heightened Alert" on the security screen at Ripley's Aquarium, I was taking no chances for my protection - I might've grabbed one of the biscuits to protect myself against shrapnel too...Let's just have it on record...Mary lived up to the Boy Scout Mantra - "Be Prepared." I think I started humming, "I Will Survive." That biscuit could've done the trick if the situation was for real.

The Ripley's Aquarium was cool too although I am very sure that the sharks were following me and taunting me just because...(they know how scared I am of them - I'd rather die than come face to face with one in the ocean...I can't even watch them on TV) -- those prehistoric nightmares looked at me with their beady little eyes and lingered FAR too long for it to be a coincidence...

Okay, "CHURCH" this morning....I am not one to question a church service...Getting Ready: I rolled onto the floor - no level change (from the deflated) mattress this morning, got up at 6:45 with the notion that "church" started at 8:30...well the flurry started at 7:30-ish (After we started a pot of water for coffee, the boys were getting cereal, we were loading up stuff and leisurely pulling down the tent) -- YIKES - CHURCH started at 8 - cereal, coffee - not happenin' ...oh by the way, we had to do the flag ceremony, boys in full gear and I was still donning my, "UGA -- 2005 SEC CHAMPIONSHIP SHIRT" with Devon or Nolan's old soccer shirts, turquoise flip flops, my Versace (STOP LADIES -- yes I OWN a Versace item....it's the only Versace thing I own) glasses with rhinestones and my hair pulled on top (YES on top) of my head...I raced into get ready mode and made sure I at least cleansed my face with Arbonne products (incredible by the way), pulled on a whole new outfit (that matched the turquoise flip flops) and quickly ran outside...to Mark racing into the bathroom with a panicked look on his face (he had to get ready too)....he had pulled Nolan together with his complete uniform(Thank you!)....Well, we raced over to the service and to begin, one of the Scouts had a fabulous, heart-felt prayer and we were good to go....UNTIL..."Join Pack Leader So-And-So with "AMAZING GRACE"....Short bit of panic for me (and Mark) but we know the first part...unfortunately, Mr. Pack Leader So-And-So did not...He had no inkling what the word are but "Amazing Grace"...the rest was gibberish....I had to draw blood in my cheeks to stop myself - I was laughing so hard...(I thought, I KNOW THIS SONG...WHO DOESN'T?...THE FIRST PART - at least sorta??) I kept thinking of all of the Boston songs that no one really knows the words to but we fumble through them, right? - think "More than a Feeling"....I wanted to cry "MORE COW BELL" a la Saturday Night Live...It was pitiful...But, I held back -- at first, I thought he had a speech or hearing impediment and then I felt REALLY bad (because I thought that attributed to the not understanding the words)....but then, he came on and spoke completely fine (NOT like when he was singing -- it was clear that he absolutely did not know the words!)...it was almost too much to bear...I was on the verge of excusing myself because my shoulders were shaking that badly...And then, the "sermon" -- a mixture of Lion King references and then Scouts (sort of) and okay, God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit....ah, no, they weren't even mentioned....Mufasa, Simba and ah, anyone else the kids come into contact with ruled.....And then, it was back to Lion King....and trusting others to help them with "tests"....the message was lost...Again, "MORE COWBELL" was on my mind....He told us to get ready for at least an hour of this...I almost lost it...I think we were in and out in 10 minutes (tops!)... (I did say "Thank God" so at least God was referenced once during "CHURCH."

Okay, so we drive home today (after all of Nolan's friends stayed at the beach to do other fun things) --- he got much needed rest, we stopped for a good lunch and then got home...well, courtesy of our well-known neighbors, of course, we had a "GO GAMECOCKS" poster on our van.... and, we were "T-P'd" in Mid-western terms...that means "Rolled" in Athens, GA terms...Okay -- Toilet Paper in our trees....Well, our other annoying, I mean, inquisitive, first grader neighbor came over and asked why the TP was in the trees and why we had a posted on the van....(it just so happens he is next door neigbors to the ones that TP'd us....the plot thickens!) I promptly told him that we had won a prize and that if he rang their (the TP-ers) doorbell more than 10 times a day for a week (15 or 20 is better) and TP'd their tree and left a poster on their door/car or better yet, both, -- within the next 3 or 4 weeks, he too would qualifty for a cool party at their NEW, AWESOME pool in their back yard....I think he has already started....Okay, Spurrier is not the only evil genious now!

Okay....next post - we will get back to UGA's passion about Integrity, Trust, Leadership and Wins...(And despite what the Gamecock fans I met this weekend said, why we wouldn't hire Mr. Redskin Reject!) And DEFINITELY shoes, shopping, etc.

THE DAWGS Laso the Cowboys and shocking upsets!

Well the Dawgs were able to give the boot, the Cowboy boot that is, to Oklahoma State yesterday Between the Hedges...I can easily say that I was not 100% comfortable with this season opener...After all, the Cowboys beat the Crimson Tide last year in the Independence Bowl and they had an extremely impressive showing last year (except against Texas) - Their record doesn't look terribly impressive but some OSU facts...Did you know that they were ranked 7th in the nation in scoring last year and ranked 16th in total offense? They also were one of only two schools to average 200 yards in passing and rushing for the season...That's nothing to whiny at all...And, seven of their defensive starters returned and 10 of their 11 top tacklers...There are also Heisman rumblings going on about Adarius Bowman too (the kid had 300 receiving yards against Kansas last year)...Luckily the Dawgs took out the branding iron and stuck it to the Cowboys...Stafford looked really comfortable and was really impressive...He went 18-of-24 for 234 yards and two touchdowns, finding nine different receivers. He had some runs too...again, impressive! Thomas Brown was on fire! Sean Bailey was on fire! The debut of TB Knowshon (don't you love the name) Moreno was also impressive - 70 yards with 20 carries...Do you think when he was born, his mom asked his dad what to name him and he answered, "Who Knows Hon?" hence the name Knowshon? That's my story and I am sticking to it...

DON'T YOU LOVE COLLEGE FOOTBALL (and the great names)? Or is it just me? Okay, it helps when you win....

Speaking of which...would you just not hate waking up in Ann Arbor this morning?...Okay, for me personally, I would hate waking up there on ANY morning but ewwww...it has got to be a dismal day. To lose to Appalachian State (granted they won their division last year), man what a bummer (although I love it...one less opponent in the Top Ten)....and to think, I thought they only had a ski team there...who knew they played football too -- and they were WAY impressive...In the sea of over 100,000 fans booing you, those kids were graceful under pressure...they nailed that victory and it was sweet...How many other head coaches are sitting in the pews of their local churches this morning thanking God that they didn't schedule to play App State yesterday as an easy opener? -- Michigan thought it was a mulligan game but they were wrong...I am thinking on Monster.com we may see a resume for a "seasoned coach, willing to relocate to warmer weather" floating around...Time will tell.

Well the pesky insects to our South managed to use a massive fly swatter on the Not So Fightin' Irish yesterday...South Bend, another place I would not like wake up in this morning...They didn't even show up for the game, did they? I was a little concerned when the only points the buzzers were getting on the board were through the uprights but points are points...then, they just blew it wide open...Note to the Irish...Raid works wonders on those bees but better yet, bring a team when you play the North Avenue Trade School....Did you see Choice? Impressive...the Dawgs are surely going to take notice....This team has a buzz in its step and is going to be a big last game challenge for the Dawgs in Hotlanta.

Other games of note...Okay, I am very upset - the Vols got defeated by Cal...Darn! I hate that when the SEC loses to an arrogant school...AND WHAT? Okay, I love the Earth, Apple Pie and America just like the rest but hold up here.... A TREE SITTING PROTEST AT A COLLEGE FOOTBALL GAME...COOKING ACORN FLOUR PANCAKES OVER A CAMPFIRE? Is that what you call tailgating, treehuggers? Well, let me invite you to the South and the SEC, Cal fans...why don't you try to come and play in Neyland Stadium or Sanford Stadium for that matter...We'll open up a can of Southern-style whoop you know what that will make your head spin...And, we'll teach you how to really tailgate...Okay, back to other scores -- Auburn squeaked by K State...Lucky they had a good 4th quarter or it would be rough to wake up there too...UCF beat NC State...poor State, they have really struggled...UCF usually pulls off a big one or two per season... BOWDEN BOWL kicks off tomorrow night....I have my tomahawk arm ready for the Seminoles' victory...Never have been a fan of those crazy Orange-clad kittens to our South...And Bobby Bowden always put the Sunvisor donning prima donna in his place (whether FSU won or not)...And the University of Sorry Chickens...they won yesterday against Louisiana Lafayette...they struggled...We're cleaning out the poultry fryer this week to get ready for a big chicken fry next weekend...

UGA is #1 (but #2) According to Fox Sports!

NEWSFLASH....According to Fox Sports - UGA is #2 in the list of the Top 25 Mascots:

"Georgia fans will certainly dispute UGA's number two ranking to any mascot in any sport anywhere, but it gets beaten out here simply because of the presentation of Ralphie, the Colorado Buffalo. UGA is an English bulldog (although the first UGA was a goat) and is certainly the most beloved and well-known mascot in college football, past UGAs have flowers laid on their graves before every home game."

NOTE: Colorado's Buffalo won because...."Now up to Ralphie IV, the buffalo made its first-ever, regular-season road trip out of state since 1989 when it traveled down to Georgia this year."

UGA is and will always be #1 in my heart!! Our next dog, will be a bulldawg! Ironically, Mark grew up with English bulldogs...Little did he know that he'd marry one!

Okay my math skills are equivalent to Ms. Teen SC's Geography skills, numbchuck skills...

THE WEEK IN SHOES: Okay, so I exempted calculus going into college but apparently I cannot add....I thought I only had ordered 3 pair of shoes this week...actually, I think it is in the neighborhood of six after I did the math (counting on my fingers)....Oops -- Hey Mark, they were almost free... I received 3 today (heavenly) and realized that 2 or 3 more are on the way and I bought a FABULOUS pair on Saturday (6 ordered, a 7th pair purchased)...They will all make the "Shoe of the Week" no doubt!

Okay, did you see the ditzy answer from South Carolina's Ms. Teen or Ms. South Carolina or?...who the heck knows what she is... one thing we know for sure, she is no Phi Beta Kappa let me tell you. HOW embarassing...What do you bet that she had "Party Like a Rock Star" and "Back in Black" at her pep rallies in high school?...I doubt she could find her way out of a paper bag let alone know any geographical facts whatsoever...Why, why, why did she have to be from South Carolina (or anywhere in the South as a matter of fact)? It is the equivalent to game day in Athens....ESPN or College Game Day captures the one "fan" with one tooth, an enormous beer belly and overalls on...CAN YOU SAY -- HE DID NOT ATTEND NOR WOULD EVER GET ADMITTED TO UGA? But yet, the impression is already made - a UGA fan with no branching in the family tree making an appearance on TV - he's a UGA graduate ...Obviously when this girl had her hair highlighted or liposuction or airbrushed tan affixed to her body, someone performed a labotomy while they were at it....EGADS, I am mortified to be a South Carolina resident at the moment....

Title reference...Did you see Napoleon Dynamite? Okay, perhaps I should not admit that I have seen it multiple times....Maybe I should be more embarrassed of that than my residence, eh?

Sticks and Little White Balls and A "Corny" Story

Okay, it's been a long week and I have been a little under the weather hence the lag in my postings this week...But I did buy three pairs of shoes this week online from the comfort of my chair (All for less than $15...and they are fabulous!) I'm feeling better thinking about them...

This week in review:

Golf...in a word...I stink (ok - that's two words). But I loved it -- I amused myself by making Billy Murray sounds as I hit the ball...Doodoodoodoo Dadadada...But, unlike him, I did not steal a custom golf cart in Sweden at 3 a.m. in the morning and get arrested for ingesting too many cold ones. I digress...I steadily improved as the morning wore on and I can honestly say, I think I could get into the game -- the carts are really fun to drive and I think it is really neat that they have a cooler attached to them too. They have to work on the colors of the carts though -- A variety of colors would be neat -- Like the bumper cars at Carowinds, all of the golfers could race to their carts so they get the cool color of their choice...Maybe they could add numbers to the side like NASCAR...That'd be sweet. I call the pink #8 car (my tribute to "Little E" - Dale Earnhardt, Jr. for those who have no clue what I'm talking about - he doesn't drive a pink car but he drives the #8 Bud car which is cool). Actually, a bright yellow #99 car (in honor of "Awesome Bill from Dawsonville" - isn't he still #99?) would be sweet too. Oh - did I tell you I am a closet NASCAR fan? Passion for designer shoes and NASCAR...an oxymoron? Maybe there is a correlation between marching band and fashion, right?

Back to golf....I am happy to report that only one of my balls landed in the water - that was the only ball I lost! (Mark had two in the water)...It helped that we were the only ones on the course too -- I would feel "Masters" pressure if others were playing behind me...I'll have to try that some day. Maybe it won't be quite as fun...Funny thing though....my husband who is the poster child for honesty, integrity and trust is a flippin' cheater...I don't think he realizes it though - he forgets how many shots he has taken (could it be his age? - he just turned 47 this month - or a devious ploy? - your call). Okay, I would count the number of strokes he had taken and inevitably, he'd say, "Well, I shot a 7 on that one..." Uh, wha? That was a 9 mister. But I didn't let on...Twice or maybe three times he did a "do-over" teeing off and didn't count it...He let me do that ONCE! Okay, so we weren't playing competitively but...I am competitive. I didn't injure my arm playing laser ping pong with my 10-year-old nephew Collin because I am passive....(And I lost multiple times - I think it was the paddle). Note to self: When I play my husband in golf (seriously) keep a tally sheet for every stroke he takes.

Now to corn...I have told you about "LM" - aka "Little Man" or Nolan....His other nicknames include "Messy Marvin" and "The Absent Minded Professor...." This story explains those nicknames. I cleaned out his back pack from last year - um, the day before school started (that has Mother of the Year written all over it)...I found awards, information that I should have been following up on over the summer and..........TWO dented cans of corn (along with 2 encyclopedias)...He was supposed to turn in the corn for a Spring food drive at school...or maybe it was a project. WHO KNOWS!?! The kid was lugging about 10 extra pounds of weight on his back in addition to the umpteen books he had stuffed into it! Well, I asked him why in the heck he STILL had the cans of corn in his backpack....He said, "Oh, I forgot to turn them in." Mark was astounded -- He pulled me aside and said, "What the hell is he doing lugging two cans of beat up corn in his back pack? Even the Fort Mill Care Center would not accept these cans as a donation - look at 'em!" ---I had no logical explanation or response (except for screams of laughter). I am just hoping that he didn't club another kid with his back pack. Boys are known to do that... The dents have the suspicious markings of the side of a small head....Well, as I was tucking him in that night, I called him my "Corn Toting Boy." I asked him again why he carried around the cans of corn and left them there....He said, "Well, someone has to support Iowa mom." Corn...Iowa...His dad lives there...I was in stitches.

Nolan's take on Iowa and "living" there this summer...."Mom, there are only three things in Iowa. CORN, Long stretches of highways and itsy, bitsy small towns...." The boy has a point.

The kids have adjusted to school life this week -- the question is, have we? Football, Scouts, private French Horn lessons, band practice, Wendy's (STILL!) during the week...I am glad it's the weekend - I need a break from the hub-bub! Well, gotta check on Nolan and his buddy John - they are trying to fry Egg Beaters in the cul-de-sac (I will do anything to keep them amused!) The girls would "freak" if they knew that Egg Beaters were made from REAL eggs...I am thinking our dinner is already made for tonight (at least Nolan thinks so!)

THOUGHT OF THE DAY: You can never have too many shoes or purses!

Congrats WVU, is golf a 4 letter word?, elementary school sociopaths and shopping online

Okay, Congrats go out to the Mountaineers of WVU...it appears that in the Princeton Review of the Top 366 colleges, the 'Eers got named the top party school of the year. The factors considered were consumption of beer, liquor and drugs and the huge influence of sororities and fraternities....Another factor included...studying time (or lack thereof). What do you bet that the students entering or currently in WVU had "Back in Black" and "Party Like a Rock Star" featured at their high school pep rallies? I am betting the probability is high....Georgia was high on the party list too I must say (that's a shocker)..... SHOUT OUT TO Jeff A. -- You are living up to your alma mater's call to fame! Okay, the University of Missouri Rolla (Mark's Alma Mater) also made the list...but not that one - it was characterized as "a school of nerds: run by the nerd and for the nerds." It ranked high on the "Best Career/Job Placement Services" and "Class Discussions Rare" list....70% graduate with an engineering degree....Hmmm - I am thinking maybe they would have chosen Chris DeBurgh over ACDC, ya think?

The question of the day...Is golf a 4 letter word? Well according to the madras plaid-clad Caddyshack wannabe next to us hitting on the driving range it is....Note to self Mr. Fancy pants...madras does not work for you - you are totally trying to have the Ivy-league, frat boy vibe going on but YOU ARE 40+ -- your golden years are gone - you are not in Kansas, I mean college anymore! LIVE WITH IT!....I will give him credit though...Like the dad in "The Christmas Story" he wove a tapestry of expletives that was pretty brilliant actually - he used illiteration (sp?) and word combinations like nobody's business...mind you, this was on the driving range...Mark was oblivious...he was busy concentrating on his swing and Rolla's superior Career Placement office....

Well, I am going to play my VERY first round of golf tomorrow - only 9 holes...I am going to try to make par (for the whole course on 9 holes - I always dream big) ....I play a mean game of miniature golf but seeing there will be no windmills to hit the ball through (and considering I can't hold the club and hit the ball through my legs) I am not sure I am going to be "game on." After missing the ball a few times today and creating "divets" the size of small rock quarries, I am a little concerned for those playing behind us. I am thinking there will be a lot of play throughs....I did crack a few good ones with my driver and the tee (although I was informed by Mark I can't use a tee off of the box - darn)...I am thinking that I will be the female "Boo Weekley" - have you heard him give interviews? PRICELESS and he's ranked 24th in the world....He didn't know what the Ryder cup was and hadn't really watched it...WOW! Okay, I'm him in female form and 24th in the world (that's 24 millionth), right? I have already begun practicing a gutural (sp?) "FORE!" just in case it will be needed tomorrow.

Okay, tonight was "Meet the Teacher" night at the elementary school So I have requested that the "Little Man" (LM) not be assigned to a classroom with a sociopath he has been in class with two out of the last three years.....Guess who's in his class AGAIN this year? You guessed it...The kid was expelled for five days in the 1st grade for bringing a knife to school (did I tell you he stole things out of the teacher's purse on two occassions as well?)...in FIRST GRADE!...Well, last year LM did not have him in class (Thank you Jesus!) He got expelled again - for what else but punching another kid in the face.....And, he is obsessed with my little guy....STALKER obsessed ...And, Nolan's desk where do you think it was?....you guessed it, right next to sociopath and another kid who has attempted to strangle one kid and beat up another....AND HE LOVES Nolan too...ARRRGH! Well, we are in a dilemma - like the teacher, love most of the other students but we have a disaster brewing, I can sense it...We are secretly plotting to pair the two misfits together or against one another to perhaps get them both expelled permanently....we are evil! Did I tell you that his teacher is adorable - great shoes, great clothes and seriously, she is a great teacher....She graduated from high school in 2001....ah, wha???? So she was born in .....1980 something?? Wow...Man, I would say that I had clothes as old as her but I had to stay on top of the trends ya know and got rid of the 80's things, and now the clothes I wore then are back "in"--- should've save them darnit!

OKAY -- NOTE TO SELF: Have Nolan watch Oprah's episode on "Toxic Relationships"....

Okay SHOPPING ONLINE - Usually, great but not a good experience today....We - actually Casey - loaded (literally) three shopping carts from Alloy, Delia and Target...Ummm, well, the carts were not saved or were dumped for some reason....When I went to place the order, NOTHING was there...this is a mother-of-a-strongwilled-anal retentive-self-structured/overly-planning-child's nightmare! She is going to have to reload the entire carts - EEE-GADS!.....World War III will ensue in about 30 minutes from now (after band camp). For someone who is a band "geek" (self proclaimed that is ) she is very into clothes....Do band geeks get into clothes? Please comment - Perhaps I am harboring an urban myth - band and high fashion don't mix. Did I tell you she wants to be a fashion designer and get a scholarship playing the French Horn? Okay, oxymorons of all oxymorons...But don't you just love shopping online?...I have weaned myself from Zappos.com (sort of) but there are so many other websites out there....okay, I must focus on my rebuttal for Casey when she returns home after almost 4 hot sweaty hours of band camp and her assumption that all is well in shopping paradise...We'll see...News at 11! Okay - I just got a hiss and a "HRRRRRRRRRRRRRR (like the gutural "Fore!" I need to shout tomorrow!)

Back to better news....Did I tell you about the Devon Car Debaucle of 2007? Well, it involves sheer brute strength - me and Mark pushing Devon's car down Dobys Bridge Road, on Tom Hall Street, etc...Major plumber action going on if you know what I am saying (I think I had a "Wife Beater" on and some torn Umbro shorts and Mark's flip flops...not my best look - At least I could have had some good shoes on, right?) Well, there was something majorly wrong with that picture besides the enormous fashion emergency that was displayed. Guess where Devon was? At Carowinds with the girlfriend...Ah, wha...Yes, you heard me. COMPLETELY bugged out on us....I was tempted to open a big can if you know what I am saying....

Well, prior to "The Great Push of Dobys Bridge Road" we got the brilliant idea of using the Suburban to push his car down the street - We heard a crunch and (GASP!) my UGA Alumni license plate cracked in half....Not a good idea we found. Long story short, no one in their Lexus (would that be "Lexi" for plural - multiple ones just swooshed on by), Escalade(s) or even Kia(s) stopped to help us out...Thank goodness a dilapidated van with two men with the same number of teeth (two) stopped to help us out. I got the sneaking suspicion that they had been in the same boat as us at some point in their lives. I didn't even have a cold beer in my purse to offer them...Darn, I meant to bring my insulated purse for the push too....I thought about offering them an Altoids but didn't want to offend them. Well today, I got a new license plate that is fantastic! -- Pewter, with a HUGE "G" in the middle, Georgia Bulldogs around the "G" and it has "The Arch" and "Sanford Stadium" on it! Bought it in the Hill, Rock Hill that is! GO FIGURE! At least the whole day was not a total loss!

IT'S BACK TO SCHOOL SALE TIME -- BUY THE SHOES!

BACK IN BLACK,Shop It To Me, HSM2,BB8 and Carowinds!

Okay, you knew I went to the Open House last night. I was banned from the pep rally but all the other parents "rallied" around me and encouraged us to stay so Mark and I walked proudly into the gym. Nolan and "THE GIRLS" friend Ali's brother Daniel (the son of the chest letter "F" for the September 6th home opener) shouted the girls names feverishly from the bleachers. I just sat back and smiled. Mark was in between us and I couldn't possibly reach over to tell the boys to hush as they heckled their sisters. It was a pinnacle moment of parenthood - I realized when you can't do it, you just must allow your children to embarass the heck out of their siblings. It was a very proud "ah-ha" moment for me.

The marching band was awesome at the rally! I was very impressed with their performance as was everyone else in the audience. "THE GIRLS" and Ali got over their extreme embarassment and played their hearts out! It was really great. Besides their performance, the highlight of the night was when the student council performed and had the spectators in the stands imitate what they were doing....to of one of the best songs of all time --- ACDC's Back in Black (the Nation Ford High School's mascot is the Falcon and their colors are Red and Black, hence the song selection....I don't think Chris De Burgh's "Lady in Red" would have had the same pep rally vibe so they went with the natural choice....) I had to resist the urge to pull out my air guitar and jump a-top the bleachers...although that would have gone off the charts on the embarassment meter and would have been an incredible moment for me as well - I would have added in character building for them, but I resisted...The stands were definitely rocking. The student council also performed to the bleachers on the opposite side and selected another great song but I was still revelling in the ACDC experience....The cheerleaders and dance team performed to "Party Like a Rock Star" a fine song by The Shop Boyz who put the CR in crunk -- I tell you, between performing to "Back in Black" and "Party Like a Rock Star", I feel the virtues of America, Apple Pie and Mama were passed along to our kids last night. Again, a proud moment for us parents.

I have not told you about this yet and it is another late breaking development...It is called "Shop It To Me." It is an email service that sends you the latest sales for all of your favorite shoe, clothing, accessories, etc., designers in the business. You get to chose all of the designers you are interested in and they send you the sales from all of the websites, stores, etc., on a DAILY basis! It is pretty awesome....CHECK IT OUT -- www.shopittome.com. Okay, so I do this....I pretend I have money and put the $1,218.00 Missoni Full Length Jacket in my shopping cart (it was regularly $1,523.00 so it qualifies as a bahgan)...along with the $335.00 Celine pumps (regularly $598.95). Then, I pretend to really contemplate the purchases..."hmmmm, it would go perfectly with my jeans, my suit, etc., but you know, the color is just off somehow." Then, I remove them from my shopping cart and have a cathartic experience - I feel that somehow I have made a very sound financial decision to refuse the "retail call"...Okay, Shop It To Me also features the Gap, Liz Claiborne and more main stream lines as well...But what fun is that, right? They really do have some great bahgans too (and I am not exagerating either $19.99 and up...)

Okay, is anyone else watching "High School Musical 2?" this evening? It is going to be a HUGE hit....men from all over Charlotte are calling in to Talk Radio shows to complain - their Big Screen TVs are being taken over by groups of giggling pre-pre-teens, pre-teens and teenage girls while they have been banished to watch "the game" on the small set they have in the guest room. Casey (extreme vegan and "non-preppy person" in her own words is watching it....okay, does that not seem like a very "preppy" movie....maybe it's just me.)

Me - Tonight, I will be watching "What Not to Wear" and "Shut Up!" and I think Stacy London has another new show premiering soon....Has anyone watched "Hollywood Ink" yet? Love Kat Von D....I am an admitted reality TV show junkie....

Speaking of reality shows -- Big Brother 8....the shoe salesman Justin GOT the proverbial "boot" instead of Dick, the uber-tattooed father of Daniele...Loved having a shoe salesman in the house and you just kind of got the feeling he really loves shoes, fashion and again, shoes, really high end shoes....Well, I don't think he did shoe sales people justice...He was pretty much a pompous kind of guy. Now, Nigel Tuffnel would have been perfect -- He always wanted to be a shoe salesman...(only Spinal Tap fans can appreciate this comment!)

Headed to Carowinds tomorrow with Mark's work -- "The" company picnic. Besides the fact I don't like rollercoasters anymore or anything that elevates me off of the ground, oh say, 12 inches, I will be spending the day holding drinks, towels, backpacks, sweaty tube socks, etc....I am eagerly anticipating this experience as I did my colonscopy three years ago. Pray for us.

If the shoe fits, buy several pair!

EXTREME Vegans, SHOES (Breaking news!) and Pep Rallies!

Okay, the key to blogging is to do it everyday, right? Well, I have not been so good doing so - my apologies to my fans...or is that fan? I will be diligently updating my blog on a regular basis from now on. Perez Hilton does it so why can't I, right?

Okay, "THE GIRLS" have decided to become extreme vegans...We are receiving information from PETA everyday. Okay, I am a vegetarian but I eat seafood and dairy now...and, it's for health reasons - I don't hug trees or handcuff myself to chickens' necks or cows' ankles or anything (uh, that sounds like cruelty to me...) I was recently chastised by "THE GIRLS" for purchasing a Lucky Jeans belt for $7.50 because it was made of animal hide (Can you believe I got a Lucky belt for $7.50? I almost fainted....I fretted over paying what I thought would be $15 but I was convinced by Mark to go ahead and bite the bullet --- what a bahgan! My heart is palpitating at the moment at the sheer excitement of scoring this deal! It's huge!) I digress...this vegan thing is EXTREMELY exhausting...and, they have modified their version of "Veganism" too -- They eat cake (uh, hello, there's milk in cake from a cow and how cruel is it to milk a cow, and eggs from chickens - egg delivery, very painful...okay, pardon my sarcasm)....It basically stinks to be the parent of teenage girls....Having vegan teenagers, the pain increases exponentially by the power of ten....

Case in point -- I was told the other day that I am basically half dead....I've reached the halfway point of my life. Nice -- I told them they both were going to promptly meet the end of their lives at age 14 if they didn't shut their mouths (Okay, in a weak moment I said "Shut up!" not "Shut your mouths.") Again, the Mother-of-the-Year award is probably in the back of a UPS or FedEx truck waiting to be delivered to me any day now....And, I actually threw out the, "Save the drama for your mama...." and then had to say, "Wait a minute. I am your mama....Alright, dish it out to someone else who cares." God bless my parents who raised THREE girls...(we weren't this difficult I am certain). When they appear on the Oprah, Mory Povitch or Jerry Springer shows, I am not responsible and have told them that repeatedly.....

Oh, and football -- the little man is playing again this year (on the Yellow Jackets --- WHERE ARE THE DAWGS?) I was let down a bit by his team assignment but at least he was not a Gator or a Gamecock....I still can't believe they don't have the Bulldawgs for a team....I am sure the name is way too intimidating for the rest of the teams in the league....And guess what footballs are made out of? Does the term "pigskin" conjure up a thought for you? Nolan needs a new football (I think this makes his oh...20th now)..."THE GIRLS" are wigging out with the fear of dead animal parts in our midst....

BREAKING NEWS! The new Saks shoe store is opening tomorrow in New York....more than 100,000 shoes on the floor (I am getting verklempt....I am planning for my ashes to be strewn across the merchandise floor....) They have their own flipping zip code - it's the size of a small town! HOW incredible is that? I am going to put that on my list of places to visit before I pass (considering I am half dead at the moment!) The shoes they featured on The Today Show today -- to die for, literally. Christian Lebouitton(sp? I just know the shoes!), Jimmy Choo, Chanel...My heart is racing now! I love shoes...Can you imagine 100,000 shoes in one place?...I will have to take smelling salts with me when I visit...Okay, that's completely "old school" -- Again, I am apparently aging rapidly...

Okay, "THE GIRLS" have an open house at their new high school late this afternoon....and then, a pep rally follows! Mark and I had an idea...He, along with Bill Thomas (the father of one of their friends), our daring neighbor Jay Wolf (father of John, Morgan and Tyler) and either our neighbor Jimmy or Mark will don the letters N-F-H-S on their chests for the pep rally (one letter on each chest of course). We definitely know that Mark, Bill and Jay are or would be totally in on the "gig." We have to ask the others....I am so into embarassing our children as much as possible (it builds character, right?) "THE GIRLS" are sweating bullets. Ali said her dad is "in." Probably can't pull it off tonight but definitely for the home opener on the 1st of September....Being a parent of two vigilant vegans also opens up many possibilities for parent paybacks....

I am thinking of starting a fund to reach my "Shoe Mecca" -- actually, I may qualify for a senior discount to visit there considering I am half dead now....

Life is short - buy the shoes!

Travel, Survival and what else?...Shoes, Dawgs and Craniums!

First, I want to give a big "GET WELL SOON" shout out (do the proverbial "they" still say that?) to my 5-year-old neice Maggie...she has mono AND bronchitis...A little gift is on the way sweetie!

We survived the trip to Athens and back -- it was touch and go there for a minute. I thought I was going to have to get out the can opener if you know what I mean .... The mere sound of me reaching for it and perhaps the couple, "You wanna piece of me's?" hushed the arguing in the back for oh, say, one minute....but that one minute of peace was priceless. I am waiting for the parent of the year award to arrive in the mail any minute now.

Athens was great - Mimi and Pop are great too! Nephew Mick had already left when we arrived - Nolan and Collin were in a sugar/carb laden coma from all of the sweets, etc., that they injested during the week!

Of course, because it was a tax free weekend, we were compelled to shop (poor Mark got a chance to act as a chaffeur as usual to 4 shopping crazed females)....We pretty much hit pay dirt. I only bought 3 pair of shoes (and one of them were Jazzercise shoes - a business must have...) And, I did put one pair back thank you very much - it was only $4.99 and I resisted!! Can you believe it? They were cute too and yet, I slid that box into the rack in front of the cash register (with all of the chotchkes...sp?) Okay - I almost put them on the counter but I was overcome with the feeling that I was not going to succumb to the shopping bug... I was quite proud of myself. (And, the girls comments about how ugly the shoes were and the "hideous" square toes had NOTHING to do with my putting them back in the incorrect spot in the store...)

And, the shoes I did finally buy were bargains too so the adrenalin was really pumping! I actually put 3 shirts back on the rack too...I am learning shopping restraint. AND, the piece de la resistance (is that how you spell it) for my demonstration of shear will power was this....I did not (I repeat) I did not buy the Bulldawg high tops for myself....$19.99 and I didn't do it...I didn't even buy the Steve Madden sun glasses for $9.99. I think I have turned a shopping junkie corner.

Nolan has 3 official "G"s for his football helmet thanks to Pop! He is going to wear one of them (or probably all 3) proudly on his HUGE, adult-sized helmet even if he plays for the Gators, Yellow Jackets or Shame - I mean Gamecocks this year. He may even play for the Fightin' Irish but that "G" will be prominently displayed on his helmet - heck, we could probably run an entire advertising campaign for a major sponsor on the helmet AND include the "G" and other logo....Do you think Nolan will have a complex about his head size? He got it honestly - I have several planets orbitting mine so he was bound to be blessed with a head, in the classic words of Mike Myers, "like Sputnik."

How did I get from shoes, to Bulldawgs to head girth? Who knows...All I know is UGA is #13 in the AP pre-season poll (expect an update on SEC and the City by the way)....the Gators are #2....My friend Seminole-loving friend Kelly threw up in her mouth a bit about this one as did I. I don't consider #13 unlucky - it's just a starting point for the top!

Shoes, dawgs and a kid with a head like his mother's (and one only a mother and Mimi can love)....life doesn't get any better than this!